Four Months

Has it really been? Is it possible that I have gone four months without speaking to my best friend? Has it really been that long since our last moment together? Oh, how I miss you Dennis James Foster, Jr. I still love you as I did the day I said, "yes" when you were on one knee singing sweetly to me. Our babies miss you too. I hope when they call you on their play cell phones that you are answering in heaven and speaking directly to their heart how much you miss and love them. If I could only change the past, I would. Someone said, "we must move forward". I say, "we must never forget and take our time because we can never get back yesterday".

May the Lord watch between me and thee while we are absent one from another.

-- enscription on our first charm necklace and we recited it when we spent the night away from one another..I still whisper it knowing I will see him again

Missing

Today I walked into church with my two girls and something was missing. The same something that has been missing for almost 4 months now. I watched other cars pull up with couples, families, or even in separate cars but reunite at the building. It sent my heart into a million shattered pieces that no one was able to pick up off the floor for me today. I miss him every moment. I wish people would stop saying it will get easier. I wish people would understand that when I don't smile it isn't because I'm mad or something is wrong other than the obvious. I just miss him!