Here's your chance.... You have something to say to me but don't want to say it to my face because you think it will hurt me or anger me, then Email me at mommy2kaitlyn726@yahoo.com or post comment on this spot.
Rumor has it that someone thinks the following:
You think it is easy to be me.
You think I should be well on my way to a new life by now.
The journey of grief should be over.
You could do my life better.
What it is it? You lost a family member too so you know how this feels----wait was it a spouse----wait....did they commit suicide....wait....did you find that person dead?
Be careful how you respond because words are powerful. Words are very powerful.
Pass no judgment that you are not ready to hear a response back from me.
Saturday, July 7, 2012
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6 comments:
Hi Crystal,
It's Mama T. (Kristy Titcomb Miller's mom). I have something to say to the clueless rumor mongers who think it would be easy to be you, that you should be on your way to a new life by now, that your grief should be over, and last but not least, they could do your life better.
Until any such person or persons have walked in your shoes, they should keep their disgusting opinions to themselves. The truth is they don't want to walk in your shoes because if they had to, they would fail.
If they feel you should be on your way to a new life with your grief behind you, they have no true interest or concern. For if they did, they would know that your grief will be with you the rest of your life, that you want 'normalcy' back more than them. If they were truly your friend, they would never judge, but ask to walk beside you and be a real friend.
I wonder, where is all the compassion, kindness and empathy which was displayed last year? Where are all the friends offering understanding and the willingness to lend emotional support, and time?
True, everyone has their own life, their own families, their own schedules, but life is about being there for friends. Just being a friend. Going out for a cup of coffee, a pedicure, a movie.
I mean, if people have time enough to be saying distasteful things about you and your life, then they aren't real friends anyway. They would use their time more wisely instead of being critical to a situation they cannot begin to relate to. It's so easy to make judgments from the cheap seats!
So my dear Crystal, know that we are so very proud of the woman and mother you are and continue to be. We love you and your beautiful daughters!
Thanks Mama T. Love you too
When I see you, I still see the pain that you carry. I hurt for you more than you know. But, I am just not sure what to say or do.
I have lost someone(s). I have lost a husband. Or when I found out at the court house that I had been divorce for one month. Yet still he was/had been my husband for seven years. My kids lost, my son lost more because he had memories, my daughter only had six months worth. I carried a strange kind of guilt around for many years. Yet others still talked about me and not to me. I understand to a degree.
I do not begin to know how you feel and the depth of your pain, for my pain was different. My lost was different. I understand your anger, yet my anger was still anger.
Even with a "new" life, that life will always be apart of you. Those memories will also be apart of you.
People tend not to understand for fear that they will have to accept your truth, your hurt, your pain. They think that they will have to carry the heavy weight, when all you want is a little bit of happy, simple normal. Just a little.
Me as a friend, well, I am still afraid to let people in. I wish for pedicures and days out with friends. I am just a private person. But when I see you I wish I could tell you these things. I care about you. I stop when I see EMS. I worry about you and the girls. That's just me. I stop and am frightful to knock to make sure that you are okay. Because I guess I was not a "true" friend previously. Not because I think you are any different than me. I just do not want to intrude on your space.
I know you have heard it over and over and over. It gets better with time. I can say I am alot better 12 years later. But it still does not change that he is not here and he is not their dad. The dad they have now is simply the best. But when the day is done, I am sure my son longs for him. And I will continue to long for him for my son.
So maybe not a pedicure, but an Italian ice would be a great start.
Love Italian Ice at Ritas, let's do it!
Hey Lady, when would you like to get together. Sorry for the delay but I thought my comment would generate a email to me.
V
Hey Lady, when would you like to get together. Sorry for the delay but I thought my comment would generate a email to me.
V
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