Special Time with Mommy

Today was hard as Kyleigh has not been interested in feeding at all. She has been very sleepy. The physical therapists assured us this is normal and best for her to sleep if she is not interested in feeding. So they have relied on her feeding tube for many feedings today. At her 5pm feeding, using the tube, she was able to have some special mommy time. I was able to give her "kangaroo care" and nuzzle her skin to skin while she fed through the tube. I held her like this for almost an hour. It was such a blessing to spend that time with her. During that time her stats were perfect. It's amazing that when the nurse took her to put her back in the bassinet her stats immediately changed like she knew that mommy was no longer holding her. We came to the realization today that she will most likely not be at home this Christmas. That was a hard thing to admit. But Kaitlyn is very aware of Christmas and still needs mommy and daddy to carry on. We are hoping our family agrees to still celebrate Christmas at our home that morning so that Dennis and I are not left grieving Christmas too. Then we can visit with Kyleigh in the afternoon. It will be hard not having her home but even harder ignoring Christmas day altogether knowing others are celebrating with their families. So pray for us that we continue to grow strong as a family unit and that the health and well being of all of us is guarded. With the sicknesses going about I am fearful of any of us catching even a cold that would separate us from Kyleigh.